You’re doing all the “right” things on your cruise—tipping early, clearing your buffet table, even reusing your coffee cup to be eco-friendly. It feels thoughtful and polite. But to the crew? It might be driving them quietly crazy.
I dug through crew forums, Reddit threads, and insider blogs to uncover what cruise employees really think. And it turns out, some of the kindest guest habits are actually the ones that annoy staff the most, create extra work, or even break hygiene rules.
The worst part? Most crew won’t say a word. They’ll smile and nod—while secretly wishing you’d stop.
If you want to be the guest the crew remembers for the right reasons—not the one they vent about in the staff lounge—this list is your cheat sheet.
Don’t Clear Your Own Table—You’re Not Helping
It feels really helpful, right? You’ve finished your meal at the buffet, and instead of leaving your mess behind, you stack your plates and walk them to the nearest counter. Maybe you even wipe the table with a napkin for good measure. Crew must appreciate that, right?
Not exactly. According to multiple crew comments and Cruise Critic threads, clearing your own table actually throws off their system. It disrupts sanitation procedures, can cross into safety violations, and worst of all, you risk creating more mess.
One cruiser mentioned seeing a guest spill water while trying to help, causing a slip hazard. Another crew member on Reddit wrote, “We love that you care—but please just walk away. It’s our job, we’ve got this.”
If you’re worried about being rude by leaving your dishes behind, don’t be. It’s actually the most respectful thing you can do. Let the team do their job the way they’re trained to.
Reusing Cups or Plates to Be “Eco-Friendly”
You think you’re being eco-conscious. You don’t want to waste water or create extra work. So you bring your coffee cup back for a refill or reuse your buffet plate to grab seconds. Seems thoughtful, right? In reality, buffet staff hate it when cruisers do this.
Reusing dishes breaks every hygiene rule on board. It’s not just frowned upon—it’s dangerous. One former crew member explained, “Even if it looks clean, your mouth’s been on that cup. That’s contamination.” Another added, “We get it. You’re trying to be green. But we’re trying not to spread norovirus.”
Cruisers in forums have said they felt guilty using a new plate every time. Don’t. The safest, most respectful thing you can do? Grab a fresh one. Always. No guilt needed. You’re not being wasteful—you’re keeping the ship healthy.
Reusing dirty dishes is one of the top things you should never do. Read this article to discover 28 more things that are big no-no’s in the buffet.
Crew Cringe When You Hand Them a Used Tissue
Really want to gross out the crew? Hand them a used tissue. You may think you’re being polite if there’s no trash can nearby. Or maybe they’re holding the trash bag. In any case, staff members don’t want to touch your germs.
I’ve seen it all—handing over used tissues, wrappers, gum, even diapers! These items fall under biohazard territory. One steward said on a forum, “We’re not your trash can.” Another cruiser admitted, “I thought I was being neat. Now I feel gross for doing that.”
There are bins in almost every hallway, and plenty by the buffet, elevators, and restrooms. Using them isn’t just more hygienic—it shows respect. Trust me, throwing away your own trash is one of the simplest ways to be a better guest.
Why Cleaning Your Cabin Feels Like an Insult
Let’s be clear—we’re not talking about tidying up. Straightening your shoes, tossing used towels in a pile, or not leaving the cabin looking like a blender exploded? That’s great. Cabin stewards appreciate guests who don’t treat the room like a war zone.
But you’ve crossed the line if you’re scrubbing the sink, disinfecting the counters, or wiping down the toilet before they arrive. It might feel polite or even helpful, but to the crew, it can feel like a judgment. One Reddit user who worked in housekeeping said, “It’s awkward. Like they’re trying to show we’re not doing it right.”
Cruisers in Facebook groups have confessed they cleaned because they “felt bad” someone else had to do it. But here’s the truth: stewards want to do it properly, and they’re trained to meet strict hygiene standards. Let them work their magic—you paid for it.
Did you know that cabin attendants have more responsibilities than hotel housekeepers? Check out my article: Cruise Ship Cabin Stewards: Who They Are and What They Do.
Tipping That Backfires (and How to Do It Right)
Tipping is part of cruise life. Even if you’ve prepaid gratuities, slipping someone a few bills to say thanks is perfectly fine. But, when you do it and how you do it is what makes all the difference.
The thing is, despite the best intentions, not all tipping lands well.
Giving a big tip on day one. Classic cruise advice to ensure top-notch service and set a positive tone. But the crew says it creates pressure and expectations. One forum user wrote, “When someone hands me a wad of cash on day one with a wink, I know what’s coming. Demands.” Kindness is welcome, bribes aren’t.
Tipping on the restaurant check. Staff won’t tell you not to add gratuities, but they’ll probably never see it. Tips are pooled and divided among all the staff (hopefully). If a server truly made your meal special, hand them something directly with a quiet thank you. That lands better every time.
Homemade treats. It’s a serious health no-go. Of course, it’s a nice thought to share home-baked brownies or grandma’s cookies with your cabin steward. But it’s strictly against cruise line rules. One crew member shared that they don’t know what’s in it or if the baker washed their hands.
So tip—but tip wisely. And save the big gestures for the end of the cruise, when they mean the most.
Discover the shocking truth about where your tips actually go—you’ll be surprised.
Think They Want to Chat in Port? Think Again
A little hallway chitchat is totally fine. Cruise ship employees are trained to be warm, welcoming, and friendly. But here’s what many cruisers miss: that smiling bartender in the cruise port? They’re likely racing to buy phone cards, transfer money, or squeeze in ten minutes of personal time—not up for a deep dive into your cruise experiences.
One well-known cruise blogger admitted he used to stop and chat with staff off-duty, assuming they’d appreciate the friendly connection. Turns out, he interrupted their only break.
The crew is polite. They’ll smile and nod. But that doesn’t mean they’re thrilled about long conversations. One former cruise worker put it bluntly: “That’s my only hour to breathe.” Want to show respect? Keep it brief. Let them enjoy their port stop just like you’re enjoying yours.
Crew Aren’t Lonely—They’re Just Being Polite
They smiled at you in the hallway. Maybe even asked how your day was going. So, you stop. You chat. You assume they want the company, because who wouldn’t want a friendly conversation with a fellow cruise guest, right?
But here’s the truth: that smile and small talk? It’s part of their duty time, not a sign they’re craving connection. One cruiser on a blog post said they used to linger and chat, thinking it was a nice break for the crew, until they realized they were just slowing someone down.
Many cruise line workers are working 10 to 12 hour shifts with barely a moment to breathe. During peak cabin turnaround or dinner time, every minute counts. So yes, wave. Say thank you. Be warm. Get to know their name. But keep it moving.
Respect crew members’ time by not making them choose between being kind, rolling their eyes when you start a new sentence, and staying on schedule.
The Friendly Flirting That Could Cost Them Their Job
Crew members hate it when someone tries to hit on them. Maybe a playful wink at the bar. A cheeky compliment. Perhaps even calling them your ‘favorite performer.’ But what feels like harmless fun to you? It can trigger serious consequences for crew on cruise ships.
Cruise etiquette might seem casual, but behind the scenes, there are strict contract rules. Fraternization—especially anything romantic or overly personal—is often a fireable offense. One former cruise line employee said, “Even if we’re flattered, we have to shut it down. It’s not worth risking a future contract.”
It’s not about being cold—it’s about keeping boundaries clear. Friendly is great. Flirty? No cruise ship worker needs or deserves that pressure during duty time.
So, what about if you really admire someone’s energy? Give them a glowing review in your guest post-cruise survey. They love that kind of attention.
Trying to Help with Ropes or Tenders? Please Don’t
Sometimes being helpful means not doing anything. That’s true when stepping onto a tender boat, and you see a crew member struggling with the rope. Avoid the instinct of helping them, steadying the line, or lending a hand. The crew says it’s actually irresponsible.
Remember, the crew gets rigorous training for all types of situations. They know precisely what to do. And the last thing they want is to be dragging you out of the sea or calling the medics. One crew member told me that passengers helping in the wrong way don’t realize they’re putting themselves, other guests, and the crew at risk.
The best thing you can do? Step back. Follow instructions. Use the handrails. Let crew members do their job safely and without interruption. They’ve got it—your good intentions can wait.
“Can I Come to the Crew Party?” is a Hard No
It puts the cruise ship crew in a really awkward situation when guests ask to join the crew party. You’ll hear a polite “no,” but inside? They’re screaming. In short, it crosses a line. Those spaces—the crew bar, break room, and off-duty hangouts—are the only places where they’re not expected to perform.
Under strict contract rules, spending personal time with guests can be risky. One crew member put it bluntly: “Even standing near a guest too long after hours can lead to a write-up.”
They’re not being rude when they shut it down. They’re protecting their time, their privacy, and sometimes their job. Be the guest who respects that boundary, not the one they complain about in the crew bar.
Praising the Crew? You’re Telling the Wrong Person
You had incredible service. Your cabin attendant was a rock star. The bartender remembered your drink by day two. And the show was terrific. So, you do the polite thing—pull aside the cruise director or guest services and rave about how amazing they were.
Here’s the problem: that praise doesn’t always go anywhere.
Guest services can fix cabin keys, but not hand out awards. Cruise directors run shows, not performance reviews. One crew worker said, “It’s flattering, but it rarely reaches the right person.”
If you want your compliment to count—really count—put it in the guest survey. Write down their name. Be specific. That’s what gets noticed. That’s what leads to rewards, extra time off, or a better future contract.
You’re not being rude by skipping the hallway compliments. You’re being strategic. And that crew member you loved? They’ll actually feel it.
Buying a Round for the Band? Here’s Why It’s Awkward
The band has crushed the set, you’re riding high from “Sweet Caroline,” and now you want to show your appreciation. So you wave the server over and buy the band a round of drinks. Polite, right? Generous even? It’s actually super awkward.
Policies among cruise lines differ, but most don’t allow entertainers to accept drinks from guests. Even if it’s OK, it still creates tension. One musician said, “It puts us in a weird spot. Do we say no and risk seeming rude, or yes and risk getting in trouble?”
And here’s what most cruisers don’t realize: that $15 cocktail (plus gratuity) you just bought? At the crew bar, they’d pay a fraction of that—if they even have time to go.
Want to show love to your favorite performer? Mention them by name in the cruise survey. That kind of recognition? Worth more than any drink on the ship.
Telling Everyone About Your Special Treatment Backfires
One thing that gets under the skin of cabin attendants? When a guest brags about getting “extra” service, and then tells everyone else on the floor.
You might think you’re being helpful, passing along cruise tips or just sharing how great your cabin attendant was. But what your fellow cruisers hear is: Why didn’t I get that? And suddenly, five more people are making the same guest requests.
What’s worse, some may head to Guest Services to organize the special treatment. Now the cabin attendant really is in trouble.
One cruise ship staff member said, “It only takes one person to turn a small favor into a floor-wide problem.”
Special requests aren’t bad, be happy when they’re fulfilled, and keep it to yourself. If you really want to be the perfect guest, thank them in your cruise survey and leave a generous tip.
Mid-Song Requests? That’s Not the Time
You’re feeling the vibe. The baby grand’s humming, the martini’s hitting, and your favorite performer is deep into “Piano Man.” So you slide up and drop a casual, “Do you know any Adele?” Cue the internal eye roll.
Cruise ship staff are trained to be engaging, but mid-song? That’s not the time for a dinner table chat. One pianist said it best: “It’s like interrupting someone mid-sentence—except I’m using both hands and my foot.”
They’re not ignoring you—they’re performing. Save your requests for the break, not the chorus. Your fellow cruisers will thank you. And so will the piano player, even if they never say a word.
Be the Cruise Passenger the Crew Actually Talk About—in a Good Way
Avoid these cringeworthy moments when interacting with the crew, and you’ll make everyone’s life more enjoyable. To be the perfect, polite, and helpful guest, no need to clear buffet plates, engage in lengthy conversations with crew members, or help when no one’s asked.
Sometimes, doing less is precisely what makes you stand out. One cruiser said they got the warmest thanks “just for giving the crew space to breathe.” Be relaxed, be thoughtful, and let the crew do what they do best. Happy cruising!
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